When people talk about the relief of back-to-school in January, I smile politely and nod.
Because in my house, school never really leaves.
I’m a single mom with two teenagers — 15 and 17 — both doing online schooling at home. Add to that my 19-year-old special-needs son, who doesn’t work and is home every day, and suddenly those long Christmas and New Year holidays feel… well… extra.
There is no dramatic shift from chaos to calm.
There is no house that magically empties at 7:30am.
There is just more of the same — with less routine and a lot more hunger.
Our domestic worker goes on leave and I take over all her duties.
Online School Comes Without a Bell
Online school doesn’t come with a bell that signals freedom.
It just means the kids move from pyjamas to slightly better pyjamas and log in.
The dining room remains an office and the lounge doubles as a study hall.
And the WiFi lives permanently on the edge.
The holidays don’t really end — they just a blur from one month to the next as we all forget what day it is.
The House That’s Always Full
Somehow, my home became the house.
The one where friends come to hang out.
The one where supper stretches further than planned.
The one where “sleeping over” happens without much warning.
I love that my kids’ friends feel safe here — I really do.
But when a small army of teenagers arrives, the fridge has a mild panic attack.
Milk disappears.
Bread evaporates.
Leftovers become urban legends.
And the washing machine?
It’s in a long-term relationship with exhaustion.
Holidays When You’re Always On
The holidays are intense for any parent, but when you’re a single parent — with a special-needs child — the word holiday becomes a little misleading.
There is planning, managing emotions, mediating sibling moments, stretching budgets, and making sure everyone feels safe and supported — all while carrying it alone. B
There’s no switch-off.
By evening, coffee has done its job, and a compulsory glass of wine steps in to support my sanity.No backup.
Just consistency, patience, and showing up — again and again.
January, Reality Edition
So when January arrives and people talk about “getting back to normal”, I smile once more.
Normal here is:
A full house
Online schooling
Many mouths to feed
A washing machine working overtime
A dishwasher that lands up with every glass, plate and forks we own.
And me, still holding the centre.
There’s no big exhale moment.
Every decion, every crisis, every emotional wobble lands with me.
There's no hand over, no "your turn".
But there is resilience.
And there is a quiet kind of strength that comes from years of doing what needs to be done.
Still Standing
This season of life isn’t tidy.
It isn’t quiet.
And it certainly isn’t effortless.
But it’s real.
And if you’re living something similar — juggling online school, teenagers, special needs, friendships, finances, and fatigue — know this:
You’re not weak.
You’re not failing.
You’re just parenting.
50+, still standing, and still showing up.
And that, in my book, counts as a win — even if the washing machine strongly disagrees.
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